Oz the Great and Powerful - James Franco and Mila Kunis

The Gist

Oz is your average conman.  He runs a "magic" show with a traveling circus and every night makes people believe in his tricks and happily takes their money.  Despite all of this he still feels that he hasn't reached his full potential.  One morning after angering one of the other performers Oz jumps into a hot air balloon to escape being beaten to death.  As he flies away from the circus the hot air balloon gets caught into a twister and he is knocked out after hitting his head.  The next morning he wakes up in a strange land.  He lands the balloon and begins to wander around until he meets Theodora.  She explains to him that he is in the land of Oz and that he has been sent to save the land from the Wicked Witch.  Not knowing how to deal with this new found information Oz sets off down the yellow brick towards the Emerald City to see what awaits him there.

What We Think

Reviewed by The North Star

Run Time: 130 Minutes

Rating: PG

When I first saw the trailer for this movie I was really excited.  This movie looked awesome and I was glad that they were finally telling the Wizard's story and what happened before Dorothy came to town.  The more that I watched the trailer the more disappointed I became.  The film started to become cheesier and cheesier the more that I heard about.  Even with that in my head I still saw it opening weekend. I should have trusted my gut instinct.  This movie was not very good.  Extremely average at best.  The special effects were cheap, the acting was ehh and it was way too bubbly.

First off, I need to talk about the special effects.  Since this movie was produced by Disney I expected everything on the post-production side of things to be very well done because money isn't really an obstacle.  Apparently I assumed wrong.  It seemed as though EVERYTHING was done on a green screen and no one was ever on a set.  The atmosphere of the Oz world was pretty but seemed too impossible.  Yes, it's supposed to be other worldly and impossible but they seemed to push the boundaries a little too much.  Everything seemed very out of proportion.  The flowers were too big.  The trees were to big.  The animals were too small.  I think you get the point.  Speaking of animals, one of the main characters in the movie was a monkey who lived in Oz.  I never believed for a second that it was an actual monkey.  Even though this monkey lived in the crazy world it should still look like a real monkey.  I could go on and on about all of the flaws with the specials effects in this movie but after a while it would all begin to sound the same.  All that you need to take away from this is that Disney should have either hired people more qualified or given the people they hired more money to do what they needed.  

Second, I wish that the cast hadn't been all famous people.  Maybe because this was a big budget film and they could get all huge stars?  I can understand the main character is an A-list actor but the whole cast? I felt like I was watching Les Miserables again, this time without the singing.  Anyways, if a movie is going to have all stars playing the roles could they have picked some better stars?  I mean I like Mila Kunis but her acting in this wasn't great.  She seemed way to over-the-top and cartoonish.  The same goes for Rachel Weisz.  She was always an extreme in the movie.  She was extremely angry.  She was extremely sad.  There was never an in-between.  Even when she was trying to be sarcastic or even subtle it wouldn't work and it came off as very cheesy.  As for James Franco he wasn't on the ball either.  I'm pretty neutral when it comes to James Franco but this movie made me lean towards the not liking him side.  He was supposed to be playing this sleezy con-man and I never got the feeling that he was sleezy.  To me it just felt like he had nothing else better to do than con people.  I never thought that he actually enjoyed taking other peoples money, which is what a con-man is supposed to do.  Perhaps he didn't do as well because of the director but I will talk about that in the next paragraph.  All of the actors unfortunately did along the same lines.  Everyone seemed to lack enthusiasm for the movie and their characters.  No one stood out as a strong actor and every minute that went by I kept hoping that it would get better and it didn't.
I will keep this next paragraph short because I could talk about it for hours but it's extremely opinionated and it only really has to do with Disney.  I wish that the film had been darker.  It felt like a lot of fluff to me.  As I said above about James Franco he could have been so much creepier.  The wicked witches could have been uglier and meaner and actually.....evil.  Oz was supposed to be run-down and nasty because the witches were running the land but it seemed perfectly fine to me.  All of the things I just mentioned could have made the film 10 times better but if Disney had it in their heads that the target audience was 9-10 year olds then it would make sense for them not to do that.  With that in mind, Toy Story is also meant for the younger audiences but I love it and for that fact so does my dad.  Just saying.
All in all this movie was not good.  Don't get me wrong, it wasn't the WORST thing I have ever seen and I wasn't begging for it to be over but it had a lot of problems that could have been easily fixed.  If you have any younger siblings or cousins I would say bring them but don't expect to be as entranced as they are with the merry old land of OZ.

Real Teen Rating~ C- : I’d much rather read a book.

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Magic Mike - Channing Tatum and Alex Pettyfer

The Gist

  Magic Mike
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Mike works a lot of jobs. Contractor, business manager, furniture design. It's his night gig that really makes him money though. Mike is a male stripper. When he meets Adam through a contracting job, he brings him to the club to help out, and ends up getting him a job as a performer. Mike takes Adam under his wing to teach him about girls, growing up, and stripping, and tries to protect him from the seedier side of the business.

What We Think
Reviewed by Living Destiny
Run Time: 110 minutes
Rating: R
Before I even start this I have to say, I just read the tagline for this movie. "Work all day. Work it all night." That's hilarious, and probably the funniest part of this movie.
And now, I have to apologize for the gist. I thought about just writing they all strip a lot, but that didn't seem in depth enough. Although that's basically the whole plot. In the very beginning of the movie, it seemed like it had potential. The budding friendship/mentor thing going on between Channing Tatum and Alex Pettyfer was entertaining, and I wanted to see where it went. And then it went right down the tubes. I can't even tell you what the story is, because I don't know. It hops all over the place. And here's the thing: if this were a movie solely about stripping, like I think we all expected, that would be ok. The plot would take a backseat to the constant bombardment of muscled men taking their clothes off. But there wasn't much stripping. They really tried to have a plot, to give this movie some sort of substance. And it really didn't work. There were drugs everywhere, to the point where I couldn't tell when someone was or wasn't on drugs. There was one scene where it blatantly hinted that Alex Pettyfer and Matt Bomer, another stripper, were going gay for each other, and then it never came up again. Come to think of it, I'm not sure Matt Bomer was even in the movie after that scene. The dialogue was dull and boring, and a lot of the characters seemed unimportant. There were at least eight male strippers at one point, and I could identify half of them. 
Then there was the actual stripping. Now, I'm far from an expert on this subject. But isn't it supposed to look attractive? I mean, that is the general idea. Admittedly, we watched this movie at like 8:30 in the morning, which wasn't the best idea, but still. It in no way looked alluring. It was uncomfortable to watch. I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't this. Channing Tatum went up a couple times and did some hip hop dancing a la Step Up. Besides that, every dance was essentially the same, and they always ended up with a guy in a thong pulling some random girl up from the audience and pelvic thrusting into her face. Is that what stripping is? Am I just under informed? Because to me it was awkward and the exact opposite of sexy.
The characters weren't developed well. Channing Tatum was the deepest one, but since he was the main character, that made sense. And even he was pretty flat. Just a meat head, really. Some emotional depth, but not much. Channing Tatum is a fairly decent actor, but with a character like this, the acting falls short of phenomenal. He falls for Alex Pettyfer's sister Brooke, played by a Kirsten Stewart-esque Cody Horn who has the emotional range of a sloth. It seems like she's angry a lot, but she always looks bored when she's angry, so it's hard to tell. She has a boyfriend at the beginning of the movie, but essentially he's a plot device to put off a hook up with Mike. Matthew McConaughey is in this movie too. He's the business owner/manager of the strip club. Looks nice, plays dirty, the typical pretty sleaze. Nothing too exciting. He does it well, but honestly, it's been done before.
I will say, I was impressed by Alex Pettyfer. I mean, his character was awful, don't get me wrong. Acted out, didn't listen, blah blah blah. All the characters were bad. But his acting was actually good. And this is coming from the same person who said, and I quote, "his acting is centered around brooding and looking into the distance." He was so much better than the last time I saw him. He's really learning the craft, and for someone with his looks, it's not like he has to. It's nice to see, and he did well with the poor writing and lack of character development he was given. Hopefully he keeps it up, and I'll be looking for his next movie soon.
Basically, it's a stripper movie. You can't expect it to be cinematic genius. But you can expect it to be better than this. Less than two hours felt like five when I watched it, and that's not exactly a selling point. It was dull, confusing, and hard to watch. Supposedly parts of it are based on Channing Tatum's younger years. If that's what your youth was like, I'm sorry you couldn't find anything more entertaining to do.
Real Teen Rating ~ D: Use it as an excuse not to do something

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The Sessions - John Hawkes and Helen Hunt

The Gist

The Sessions
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Mark O'Brien has had polio since childhood, and as a result can't move any part of his body below his neck. After consulting with his priest, he decides to hire a sex surrogate to help him lose his virginity and make him a man. Obviously the lack of mobility is a problem, but surrogate Cheryl will do anything to help a client understand themselves and their bodies. Sex with no strings attached is harder than it seems.

What We Think
Reviewed by Living Destiny
Run Time: 95 minutes
Rating: R
I remember seeing the trailer for this movie a long time ago, and thinking how it was a weird concept and I would never go see it. And then I went and saw it anyway. Here's the point where I say something along the lines of I was pleasantly surprised and I can't believe how much I loved it, right? Unfortunately not. It was overly graphic and seemed to cling to shock value to keep its viewers hooked. I took a screenwriting class last year, and the teacher did a whole lesson on sex scenes, and how there are intimate ways to do them, and also brash, unnecessary ways to do them. The Sessions only ever uses the over-the-top style sex scene. And I knew there was going to be sex in the movie before I saw it, I'd seen the trailers, but it just wasn't done well. Full frontal nudity shots of Helen Hunt was not something I ever needed to see. And it wasn't necessary to move the plot forward. There were four separate "sessions", and they showed Hunt at least partially naked in all of them. It was really irritating, because they could have cropped the shots to be more modest, or added blankets, or not shown the nudity at all. We would all understand what was happening. But they had to go too big, and it made it uncomfortable, at least for me. It was too much.
I wasn't overly impressed by the acting either. Helen Hunt is up for an Oscar for this role. It isn't that good. It seems like all she does is have sex and then be sad. And it isn't convincingly sad. Anyone can cry crocodile tears. She was the weak link, acting-wise. John Hawkes did a much better job as Mark. And I didn't think that when I first saw the movie, but then I looked at his acting credits. He was in Lincoln, which I saw about a week prior to this, and I didn't recognize him at all. Hawkes has some serious acting chops. His character, Mark, was well played because he didn't incur much pity. Sure, there were times when you felt bad for him, but generally he's cracking snarky jokes. He takes life as it comes, and that's refreshing to see. William H. Macy was the star of the movie though. His character, Father Brendan, was just conflicted enough between God and his friend. It didn't consume him, it just gave him a moment's pause. He added some comedic relief at points, and he made a great friend and companion to Mark. He and Mark's nurse, a sharp witted young woman named Vera, were the most entertaining parts of the film. 
This isn't a long movie. Barely over an hour and a half. I have class periods longer than that. But at times it felt long, and that's a serious issue with a movie of such short length. I found myself thinking that there were whole scenes, characters even, that could be completely cut out of the film. That could mean bad editing, or bad screenwriting, or bad acting, but it's definitely a sign that on the whole, the movie isn't good. And it's not like it's a disappointment, because I wasn't exactly expecting greatness. The points when the movie actually did something worth watching, those were the little joys. I know this is based on a true story, but I feel like they didn't do it justice. It could have been a classier, more entertaining movie. I don't know why it wasn't.

Real Teen Rating ~ D+: It passes time...barely...

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Django Unchained - Jamie Foxx, Christoph Waltz and Leonardo DiCaprio

The Gist

Django Unchained
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Dr. King Schultz, bounty hunter, buys Django out of slavery to help him find three white men who used to work on the plantation where Django had just been sold from. When Django shows a natural talent for bounty hunting, the two men strike up a partnership, spending the winter killing criminals for money. As they get closer, they decide to go on a search for Django's wife, who was sold away from him when he was sold. Their search brings them to the plantation of Calvin Candie, where they have to pull off a crafty scheme to save Django's wife from the cruelty of the slavery system.

What We Think
Reviewed by Living Destiny
Run Time: 165 minutes
Rating: R
This movie is so long. So. Long. It's nearly three hours long. I'm having a hard time getting past the sheer length of this film. It probably doesn't help that I went to see a 9:45 showing, so I got out at almost 1 in the morning. But seriously, it's so long. And the worst part is that it feels long. A three hour film can go by in no time if it is absolutely captivating and fast paced. Django Unchained, despite all of its hype, wasn't. There were a ton of little montage shots, and even some whole scenes, that could have been cut from the movie entirely, and it wouldn't have suffered. The thought process behind a movie is that every detail has meaning. If it doesn't characterize or progress the plot, it has no purpose. And some of the shots did characterize, but still felt unnecessary. Most of them didn't do either, and that gets me neatly to my next point.
This movie is directed by Quentin Tarantino. Tarantino is very much a hit or miss director. His most famous movie is probably Pulp Fiction, which most people either love or hate. Basically, he gets strong reactions. But he's so excessive in his effects. Characteristics of his movie are lots of swearing, lots of blood, and lots of explosions. And that's usually too much, but he somehow manages to outdo himself in this movie. I'm not affected by the sight of blood in the least, and even I was cringing at this one. Gunshots that would in real life produce practically no blood, on the screen produce gushing streams that shoot five, ten feet out from a body. It's totally unrealistic, and honestly it's just gross. And some of the scenes are wicked graphic. Fights to the death, whipping, a man literally being torn apart by dogs. There's no purpose to it except to shock the audience. That's really all Tarantino can do. Flashy, shock movies that are intended to get a rise out of the viewers. This is the first movie I've seen of his that had serious potential as a script, and all he could do was drag it through the mud. Granted, it did have some redeemable qualities, even some good scenes, but I would chalk that up to a fluke, and not give credit to Tarantino. Also, there was way too much use of the 'n' word. I know it's set in 1858, and that's slavery time, but it was so much. I think any word has value, but overuse of a word devalues it, and that's what happened here. They said the 'n' word so much, it ended up doing nothing at all. Which brings up a question: is this movie supposed to be a satire?
So, is it? I couldn't tell, and that frustrated me. Sometimes it leaned that way. The excessive gore, coupled with the Mark Twain-esque use of the 'n' word, made it seem like a satire. There was even one scene involving the KKK that was actually funny, and clearly poking fun at racism as an organization. But that was the only funny part of the movie. So maybe it wasn't a satire at all, maybe it was supposed to be serious. A hard hitting drama with a powerful message. So why was that funny part in there? And what's with the grotesque amount of gore and foul language? It would appear that this movie is trying to be two totally different types of movies, and ends up being a confusing mess. 
But there's a good side to every story. The script of this movie, minus the gratuitous swearing, was actually well written. It was an interesting story, although I think realistically it should have been broken into three movies, because I think there were three distinct sections of the story. Which makes it surprising that it wasn't split into thirds, given the recent trend in Hollywood to stretch every plot line out to kingdom come. It was a good story that could have been made into a truly great movie. The acting was also, for the most part, really well done. Jamie Foxx was ok, but I'd say the stars are Christoph Waltz, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Samuel L. Jackson. Christoph Waltz, the German man, was fantastic. He was probably my favorite character, because he was cunning and he knew exactly where his morals lay, even if they weren't the typical morals of society. Leonardo DiCaprio was the perfect bad guy, which was surprising to me, because I've never seen him play the villain. He was wonderfully greasy and sleazy, and he made me hate him more than I thought I could. Samuel L. Jackson was more of a minor character, but he was powerful. He played the slave master of the house, basically the head slave, whose allegiance was in more with Candie and the white folk than his own people. He was clearly intelligent, but knew his place, and his character stole the show as the real bad guy in the story. He was incredible. The only actor I really didn't like was Kerry Washington, who played Django's wife Broomhilda. She screamed too much. And I know she was a deeply abused slave, but seriously. Every time someone looked at her funny she screamed. It got as old as all the blood. 
Overall, I'm disappointed. This could have been so good. There was so much potential just waiting for a spark. And then Quentin Tarantino threw copious amounts of blood all over it, and the spark went out. The acting was good, but that wasn't enough to redeem the movie as a whole. This movie should have stayed chained.

Real Teen Rating ~ C: If there's nothing else to see...

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Melancholia - Kirsten Dunst, Charlotte Gainsbourg, and Kiefer Sutherland

The Gist

Melancholia
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Justine (Kirsten Dunst) just got married. Her sister and brother-in-law payed for and organized everything. All Justine has to do is be happy. And at first she is. But when her divorced parents quarrel at dinner she begins to feel a bit disconnected for her party, her family, and even her new husband. As Justine begins to feel more and more alienated she begins to withdraw herself from the party for long periods of time - her actions becoming more and more desperate.
Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg) is Justine's sensible sister. Though frustrated with her sister's moods, she understands Justine more than anyone else, and takes care of her no matter what. While trying to help her sister, Claire also has her own worries to deal with. Her husband, John (Kiefer Sutherland), is a scientist and talks of a planet hidden behind the sun for years. A planet that will soon be visible to the naked eye from Earth. A planet rushing through space towards them. A planet called Melancholia. Though John assures her Melancholia has no chance at hitting Earth, Claire feels sure that something bad is about to occur. But there's nothing she can do to stop it.

What We Think
Reviewed  by Dream Catcher
Run Time: 136 Minutes
Rating: R
So. I heard about this what seems like years ago but was probably a few months tops. My mind is weird like that. But anyways, I started hearing about it again recently. Where? Entertainment Weekly. They were trying to convince me to go out and watch this movie - they told me it was fantastic and beautiful and symbolic and all that jazz every movie aspires to be. So what did I do? I trusted my Entertainment Weekly and I watched it. The worst decision ever.
So, I think I'm going to start out with the thing that was the best; the acting. I'd heard Kirsten Dunst might get nominated for best actress in the Oscars for this. And, truth is, she was actually really, really good. Her character was really interesting and complex and she made everything about her believable, even things that shouldn't be. Like deserting your own wedding? Normally, people don't do that. Dunst somehow made me believe it. Charlotte Gainsbourg was actually pretty good, too. She did well as the emotionally stable sister in the beginning, and the one falling apart in the end. The other main character, Claire's husband, John, was pretty mediocre. He was nothing to rave about but he wasn't noticeably bad. His character was pretty bland, so you can't really blame him for that, I guess. The acting was by far the best part of the movie. It was really convincing. But when I say it was the "best part" I really mean it was the "only part". Because nearly everything else was terrible, contrary to popular opinion.
The script was written by the director, Lars von Trier. Ever heard of him? Apparently he's pretty famous. I've never heard of him OR his supposedly beautiful movies. Eh. Well, he wrote the script and it was perfectly average, except for the fact that nothing made any sense and the segments of the movie were unforgivably disconnected. The dialogue itself was fine. The sister-sister relationship was believable, the husband-wife relationship was fine, the end-of-the-world panic was good. But the script is the plot. And the problem wasn't exactly lack of one...it was the fact that the story contained two mostly unrelated plots. The first section is just about Justine's disastrous wedding and her even more disastrous depression (otherwise known as melancholia). The next thing I know I'm watching everything from her sister's perspective - Justine is comatose in her sadness and Claire is freakish in her panic. Suddenly it's not at all about the wedding or the effects of that. It's about a planet. Do those things seem at all connected? No. In a desperate attempt to understand, I went to the Melancholia website and was half-reading an interview with Lars von Trier about the movie. It shed some light on some things. Some. Melancholia  is an old-fashion word for depression, so if you have depression you're a melancholiac. That's why the movie is named Melancholia; Justine is a melancholiac (and because the planet is called Melancholia - who knows why). So, the movie is supposed to be exhibiting how a melancholiac deals with the end of the world versus how the average person deals with it. Moral being: melancholiacs are so apathetic they deal with the end of the world as if it's any other day - depending on the melancholiac there may even be some celebration involved. This is put up against the manic freak out of the average person. I think dear friend Lars is trying to subtly tell us something. I just haven't figured out if he's saying melancholiacs are better, or if he's just comparing and contrasting. If it's that latter, a simple Venn diagram would have sufficed, Lars. If it's the former, it would make a little more sense. Lars is a melancholiac, after all (another thing I learned on his website), so asserting his awesomeness via film would make some sense. Maybe. Except I really don't think that was his full intention when he wrote the script. I think he was going for something deep - and because he was so OBVIOUSLY trying for thought-provoking people bought into it. Wow, he has some wicked cool slow-mo images at the beginning that symbolize the meaning of the film as a whole! I think I'm supposed to be impressed! Critics say. But I don't buy it. Just because something is intended to be awesomely mind-blowing doesn't mean it is. I think some people forget that.
I will go into cinematography because it's something that I find to be really interesting and  - when pulled off correctly - makes the entire film a whole lot more beautiful. This was another good point of the movie. The cinematography was fantastic. And, though I did just recently taunt the opening scene symbolism, it was really beautiful. The pictures were grim with a sad edginess to them. My complaint there was that each was a little to dragged out - everything could have been cut a little better. If I based my grade entirely on cinematography, the movie would get an A for sure. But I don't. And though I loved this aspect of the movie - the aspect every critic focuses on with no mention of anything else - there has to be more than that to make a real film.
I'll finish ranting soon and you can go and finish watching the movie, or start watching the movie, or make plans to watch the movie, because I know my review is probably the only of its kind in the entire universe at the moment - I am the only one to dislike Melancholia. Or so it seems.You'll want to see it anyway, and I shrug at that; I would if I were you, too.
I'll end with two things. One thing I liked, and one thing I hated. Loved: there's this specific scene which I cannot get out of my head, and I honestly do love. Justine has just gotten to Claire's house and Claire has prepared Justine's favorite meal (meatloaf) in hope that it'll bring her back to the land of the living. She helps Justine in the room and into a chair in front of the dinner table. "Do you smell that?"
"Meatloaf." Dunst's portrayal is perfect. She cuts off a slice of said meatloaf and puts it in her mouth. Chews. Everyone watches intently. She puts down her knife and her fork and stops chewing. And starts crying. "It tastes like ashes."
My point in writing all that out for you is to say I didn't completely dislike Melancholia. I hated it, but I didn't entirely dislike it. If that makes any sense. There were some great scenes, but the problem was they were few and far between. Which brings me to the thing I hated: boredom. I got so bored when watching the movie that  I paused it a few times and did something else for a few minutes before getting myself to agree to resume watching. Sadly - as sad as it can ever be with movies, it had potential. But it fell flat.

Real Teen Rating ~ D+ : It passes time...barely...

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I Am Number Four - Alex Pettyfer, Timothy Olyphant, Dianna Agron

The Gist 

I Am Number Four
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Number One died when he was nine.  Number Two died when he was twelve.  Number Three just died.  Number Four has the scars to prove it.  After seeing a vision of Number Three being killed, Number Four and his protector Henri relocate from Florida to Paradise.  Paradise, Ohio. Trying to fit in as the new student in a small town is hard enough, and being an alien makes the whole thing close to unbearable.  Taking the name John Smith, Number Four finds a friend and a first love.  But the Mogadorians are closing in, and everyone around him is at risk of being killed, including himself.  Three are dead.  He is Number Four.

What We Think

Reviewed by Living Destiny

Run Time: 109 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

I saw this movie in theaters when it came out a while ago.  And at the time I found it pretty good.  Not stellar material, but it was entertaining.  Then I read the book.  And then I watched the movie again.  Kablam.  Enlightenment.  This movie was bad.  NOT.  GOOD.   Seriously it was all flash and no substance.  There were whole elements to the plot that weren't explained at all.  Just mentioned in passing.  Like, 'hey there's this super sick box that's all mysterious but that's all you get to know!'  Fail.  Major fail.  BUT you can't base the thoughts on a movie around how close it is to the book it was based off of.  That doesn't seem fair.  So this is me trying to go from a non-biased standpoint.


The acting was sub-par.  Alex Pettyfer is not a good actor.  I think the whole thing with him is that he's so stunningly attractive.  His good looks blind people.  However, after about a half an hour, even his hot-ness fails to distract from the fact that his acting is centered around brooding and looking into the distance.  That was awesome rhyming, I should be a rapper or something.  Anyway.  As the main character, he should be noticeably excellent.  He wasn't.  Boo.  Also, Timothy Olyphant wasn't very good, and he generally does well.  I don't know what the deal was here, but his character wasn't very likable.  Maybe that's how he was trying to portray it, but as Henry he was cold and uncaring, and I didn't enjoy that.  It seemed like he was always angry and didn't want to be with Number Four.  That annoyed me.  On a more positive note, Dianna Agron did a pretty good job as Sarah.  It wasn't anything phenomenal, but she was good.  I liked her character, and she...I don't even know what to write, but she did well.  RRRAR I dunno.  The one character I really really liked was Sam.  Callan McAuliffe is this 16 year old Australian kid who - so far - has been in nothing I've ever heard of.  He's currently filming some cool stuff, and I would say I Am Number Four was sort of his breakout role.  For that, I am pleased with this movie.  He was Sam.  Not just he played it well, he was Sam.  He made me laugh, and be sad (I DO NOT CRY), and he made me freak out a little - partially from the intensity of some scenes, partially because he is wicked cute.  I legitimately just spent five minutes going through all of his pictures on imdb.  He's way more attractive than Alex Pettyfer.  Wasting time staring at Callan McAuliffe.  Focus.  So, he's an up-and-coming actor who did an outstanding job in this movie, and hopefully we see him in new movies soon because he's fantastic.  Wow I just got so distracted.  What am I writing about?  


The special effects in this movie were pretty cool.  It's a movie about an alien battle, so the special effects need to be good, or else it kind of falls flat.  They worked.  There were big storms and lots of fire and telekinesis stuff, and it all looks really...well i guess not 'real' since it's supposed to be alien, but it looked believable at least.  Plus there were these big beasty things...good stuff right there.  Nothing says alien fight like big beasties, and they looked all mean and scary.  Oh my gosh, what am I, four?  Whatever.  The makeup was also done very well.  While Number Four, the main character, didn't look any different from a human, there was a breed of alien that looked very different.  They were super pale and had gills and it was pretty creepy, but the makeup was so great!  Makeup always fascinates me.  How a good makeup artist can transform someone into a totally different person or creature with so little tools, only face paints and such.  It's dazzling, really.  


But a movie can't be carried by its special effects and makeup.  A plot is required to make a movie function, and this movie was lacking so many details...well it was kind of choppy.  It fell flat, in its script and its acting. There was nothing to hold your attention, and it was missing too much and explained too little.  Nope, it didn't do it for me.  What a gross phrase that is.  Ew.  But it's true.  No me gusta this movie.  I won't say you shouldn't see it, but...I guess it's good the first time around.  Sort of?  Eh.  Sure, see it once.  If only for Callan McAuliffe and Dianna Agron.  Yupp.  I'm done now.  


Real Teen Rating ~ C: If there's nothing else to see...

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Zookeeper- Kevin James, Rosario Dawson

The Gist

Zookeeper
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Griffin Keyes is a zookeeper at the Franklin Park Zoo. He was dumped by a girl he wanted to marry and years later still can't get over and is more comfortable dealing with animals than with people, especially women. The animals of the zoo know his problem and since they are the masters of mating, give him a hand in his quest of getting his girl back. He befriends the secluded, lonely gorilla in the process who ends up as his best friend.

What We Think
Reviewed by ShoreWhisperer
Run Time: 102 Minutes
Rating: PG
This movie is possibly the most unoriginal movie. When I saw this movie trailer I immediatly though "Hitch" and"Night at the Museum". Then when you get to the actual movie and you see the Happy Gilmore bumper that means that Adam Sandler had some part in the making of the movie. Well I didn't actually think that this was going to be a good movie. . . I will say that it lived up to my expectations. Like all Adam Sandler movies it had crude and physically humor that is at some points unnecessary.

I feel bad for Kevin James some times because he plays the hopeless, awkward fat single guy every single time he is in some rom-com or kids movie. He doesn't play it that well even. He should ultimatly keep playing the guy he was on King of Queens because that was funny.

Not to anyone's surprise Adam Sandler was in the movie and to no surprise he played the monkey who constantly made the potty jokes and cracked all the inuendos in the movie. He was the "comic relief" in a movie that didn't need any comic relief because it was already a comedy. Not only was Adam Sandler act in the movie, he wrote and produced the movie which means that the all the humor was childish and filled with secret jokes for the parents that are bringing their kids to see the movie. Rosario Dawson is such a good actor. I liked her character :Kate because she was normal and didn't do anything insanely stupid, the one funny scene in the movie- when they were on the circus ribbons- was actually comical and I really laughed at it.

One thing I don't like in movies is talking animals, especially when it's not an animated movie. Night at the Museum pulled it off somehow but this movie was just a little weird. There were way to many famous people: Cher, Sylvester Stallone, Adam Sandler, Nick Nolte. It really was unnecessary, I couldn't get over it. Somehow they think that the more names you can put on the billboard the better the movie will be. That is not true however. You can't really make a movie as predictable as this good. The only reason this movie is getting a D instead of an F is because of Rosario Dawson is the saving grace of this movie and I really liked her performance in this movie. Otherwise, this movie was trying to hard to get a laugh, was way to predictable, and was so unoriginal that I could point out places in the movie where the practically the same thing happened in another movie.

Real Teen Rating~ D- : I wouldn't bother at all

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Hanna - Saorise Ronan, Eric Bana, Cate Blanchett

The Gist

Hanna
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Hanna Heller has been training all her life for one thing.  To be the perfect assassin.  Living with her father in the wilds of Finland since she was very young, Hanna has been honing her skills as a killer for sixteen years, and is ready for her mission.  Pressing a button on the tracking device her father has had with him since he escaped the CIA, Hanna jumps into the world of military intelligence to track down Marissa Viegler, a CIA member who handled her father's work.  As she travels across Europe trying to kill Marissa and find her father again, Hanna discovers things she never wanted to know.

What We Think

Reviewed by Living Destiny

Run Time: 111 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

When Dream, North and I went to the movies a while ago, we couldn't decide exactly what we wanted to see.  We were caught between seeing Beastly, Hanna, and Limitless.  After trying desperately to leave the decision to fate, the iPod-shuffle-method of invoking fate told us that we should see Hanna.  It turns out fate was playing a cruel joke on us, and we should have watched one of the other two movies instead.  

I literally don't even know where to begin.  I've been sitting here staring at the screen of my laptop for twenty minutes without typing anything.  Hum. Putting it off like a boss.  Ok.  So the beginning of the movie was kind of like a short film.  It was all artsy, with her running and hunting and taking out a deer.  Then it said the title really big.  And right there, it could have ended and been a pretty decent short film.  But noooo it had to be feature length.  And that is where the trouble began.  


This should have been a short film.  There were whole scenes that could have been cut out.  For example, there's one scene where it's literally just Marissa brushing her teeth until her gums bleed. Like the audience wants to see bleeding gums.  Gross.  There was so much material that didn't add anything to the story, and just served to make the movie longer.  If you could call it a movie.  I don't even know what genre I would classify it in.  It was like it tried to combine a ton of different genres in one.  An action-adventure, thriller, comedy, romance, feel-good, finding-yourself movie with some intrigue thrown in for color.  Try mixing all of your favorite foods together and then eating that concoction.  Sound appealing?  That's this movie.  If I wanted seven different genres, I'd look for seven different movies.  Seven good movies, not movies like this.  I was either confused or bored the whole time.  


The characters were so...blech.  Hanna, the main character, was just irritating.  I know she was raised to be lethal, and without any technology, and blah blah blah.  But I didn't care.  Shouldn't you care about the main character?  I think so.  She was so cold and unfeeling.  Generally if you're going for an apathetic character, they have some sort of weak spot that comes out in the movie.  An unintentional spot of love or hope or compassion.  Something.  Not with this movie.  Hanna was a stone-cold killer, and while that was what she was supposed to be, it made her unlikable.  Her dad wasn't much better.  He tried to be passionate and all hung-ho good guy, but he came off as a little obsessive and crazy.  Marissa was just...Marissa.  She was the bad guy.  She did bad things.  But not in a way that made her an awesome bad guy.  Meh.  Then there was this family.  They were minor characters that only had two real purposes, but were stretched to try and be meaningful (which didn't work).  Ick.  


It was so not enjoyable.  I liked nothing about it at all.  Well, that's not necessarily true.  I did like the first few shots before it showed the title.  After that, I liked nothing about it at all.  The plot took way too many unnecessary twists, the characters were bland, and I was so bored.  When you start hoping all the characters kill each other off at the same time, so the movie can be over with, you know it's not a good one.


Real Teen Rating ~ D+ : It passes time...barely...

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Sucker Punch- Emily Browning, Vanessa Hudgens and Abbie Cornish

The Gist
After her parents die and her sister and her left alone Baby Doll has no idea what to do.  The first thing that comes to mind is to protect her sister AT ALL costs.  This soon becomes a problem when her "stepfather" wants the house and land which was left to the girls in their parents will.  Baby Doll runs away to get a gun to threaten him with but by the time she comes back her sister is already dead.  Baby Doll tries to kill her "stepfather" but cannot do it so she runs to her parents grave where the police soon find her and deem her "crazy"(or in a deep state of depression).  Her "stepfather" had told the police that she killed her sister out of sadness for her parents death and he "suggests"(pays them extra) that she should get a lobotomy so she can forget her "pain".  The doctors bring her into the room for her procedure and right before they slam the hammer down she is transported to this other world.

She is now an orphan placed in a brothel to entertain a high-roller who is coming in three days to take her and she has to learn a dance to impress him so the pimp who owns the brothel can make a lot of money.  She soon discovers that when she really gets into the dance she can transport herself into a video game like world where she meets a monk.  The monk tells her that she has to find 5 things. 1). A Map 2). Fire 3).A Knife 4). A Key and 5). Something only you know what it is.  Baby Doll soon gets the rest of the girls in her "group" to take part in the journey.  She guarantees them that no matter what, as long as she is dancing they will be safe and can steal the items.  Together they will finally be able to escape the dump they live in and Baby Doll from the high roller.

What We Think
Reviewed by The North Star
Run Time: 120 Minutes
Rating: PG- 13
After seeing the trailer for this movie I thought it looked like a bunch of guys who sat around a computer and thought of how to make extremely hot girls in a movie and somehow incorporate a video game aspect in there as well with almost no story line.  Once I saw the commercial a few more times it started to sink in and I thought that it might actually be a good movie.  I should have stuck to my original thoughts.  This movie made absolutely NO sense what-so-ever.  The beginning makes sense, the middle is confusing at first and then you start to make huge assumptions on why things happened and in the end your brain gets fried and you are more lost then when you stepped foot into the movie theater.  It is very obvious that the producers/directors spent all of their time on the special effects and fighting scenes and almost no time on the actual plot.

As for the acting it was pretty decent.  Emily Browning was the best part of the movie she was believable for the part that she had to work with.  She also sang on the soundtrack (which I found out after seeing the movie) and she has an AMAZING voice!! I didn't believe it was her at first but iTunes told me that she sang it so I guess I should believe them (:  .  Back on topic, all of the other actors only acted half-heartedly and it showed.  I tried to not think of Vanessa singing and dancing around in High School Musical but her acting wasn't much better in this than in High School Musical.  In the actors defenses they didn't have to do much acting.  More than half of the movie was fight scenes, and don't get me wrong I love a good fight scene but each fight scene was to long and by the end of it I didn't care whether or not they had gotten the item.  In the end this was just a terrible movie, I have no idea what possessed people to make it and then put it in theaters.  Emily Browning's acting and the soundtrack (which was BEAST) saved the movie from an F but I wouldn't recommend it to anyone unless you want to watch a movie that makes scratch your head for a day trying to figure out what you just watched.

Real Teen Rating~ D- : I wouldn't bother at all

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Season Of The Witch - Nicholas Cage, Ron Perlman, and Claire Foy

The Gist 

Season of the Witch
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Two crusaders, Behmen and Felson, have been friends for a while and they signed up for the crusades together. So, they leave the crusades together and find themselves in the midsts of a raging plague. To be specific, the bubonic plague. Villagers have reason to believe that a girl who is a “witch” has cast a terrible curse on them and that she is the cause of the plague. If the two crusaders can get her to the monks and cure her of her “sickness” then the world can be saved and the plague cured. When the cardinal of the church asks them to join their quest. Finally, after a little thought they willingly oblige. They set off: the two friends, a priest, a faithful soldier, a merchant and a wannabe knight to deliver this girl to the monks and to perpetually save the world.


What We Think

Reviewed by ShoreWhisperer

Run Time: 98 Minutes
Rating: PG-13

I had never seen previews of this movie when I went to see this movie. I had heard that Nicholas Cage was doing another movie about a witch, or something like that but I wasn’t thinking about going. When I heard that this movie was quite gory, and a tad scary I perked up. Hopefully, there would be a reason to go see this movie after all. I will be honest, Nicholas Cage’s performances have been decreasing in talent and in actual good quality acting for a while. I liked National Treasure and I love the movie The Family Man, but really Sorcerer’s Apprentice did not floor me and left me wanting more. When he agreed to doanother about witches I got a little nervous. This was nothing like the Sorcerer’s Apprentice. First off, Disney would never allow the language in this movie. Second, the details to all the diseases and other things was not lacking in anything, quite unlike in Sorcerer’s Apprentice. This isn’t a comparison of the two movies though.

I liked this movie, I really did. After a while you get tired of watching all the attractive men in the world being stolen by equally as gorgeous women in a number of ways. So the movie that creeps me out, grosses me out, doesn’t make me cry but rather makes me want to go crawl under my blankets and pretend that I am in a world where nothing will hurt me is the movie that I wanted to go see. This movie succeeded in those terms. I was scared, but it wasn’t scary, in a weird way. It was a very suspenseful movie I was always waiting for things to jump out and make me scream but a lot of the times that didn’t really happen but that tension made the movie be always on the edge of your seat. In terms of grossness, I had to stop eating my gobstoppers and coke because the detail that they gave plague and what it actually looked like was immense and it was sickening. Luckily there were not too many of those scenes. The creepiness factor was pretty good, it was a very creepy movie and it was all dependent on Claire Foy who played ’The Girl’ or Anna. She was amazing, I was creeped out by her. I think it’s because she was good at looking innocent and poor and beaten that when lines like “let me heal your pain” or some other really un-innocent line came out of her mouth it was unsettling because of how innocent she did look. The whole movie had an unsettling feeling to it. The setting was a primary part of that and they hit it right on, the set was amazing and also the time period was captured really well. I could almost feel what it was like to be living in that time period where there was always this underlying fear of always obeying the rules and loyally following the church no matter if they are abusing their powers. That was all done very well and set the mood of the movie perfectly.

But the script…everything was goood….except the script. Now this is such a fixable thing that it annoys me. Anyone who enjoys watching a movie that is based in a different time periods and appreciates the authenticity that comes with it does not want to hear a man wearing chainmail during the crusades say this: “Did you see the cardinal? He looked like someone just p***ed in his holy water.” A crusader would never in a million jillion years EVER SAY THAT!!!!!! I understand that this movie is not supposed to be strictly a history film but it does have that aspect to it so is it right to through that vital part of the movie right out the window? I don’t think it is, I also understand that we have to ‘dumb down’ the scripts and the language so everyone can understand what they are saying. You don’t have to ‘dumb it down’ so much that it doesn’t even fit in the time period. I thought that the line was funny I do admit that but there was tons of that stuff but only in certain characters. There were characters like Kay and Anna that had lines that actually fit the time period and were easier to understand. It does not even make sense to have someone in a crusader get up speaking like he is from the twenty first century that only works at halloween parties. That bugged me through the entire movie, it was so annoying that I couldn’t even lke those characters as much as I should since it was mostly Felson and Behmen speaking those lines. It is an easily fixable change that would have made the movie so much better.

I also did not like the devil. They had me ready to see this horrendous monster that would make me want to cry and instead it looked more like a dinosaur. Yes it had pincers and and it did this weird thing that it could hug you with it’s wings and then burn you alive, even that did not scare me. I wanted something more grotesque he looked more like a gargoyle come to life. When you are doing a movie like this you have to understand where your oppurtunities are and you can not let them lag especially at the climax. That is the time where you have the audiences feelings in the palm of your hand and you can do anything you want with it. That’s what we want to happen too. We want to be scared or choked up or happy but you have to do something. That is vital but it wasn’t fully there in this movie. I was vaguely nervous because of the monster but it could have been more and that made me upset.You can’t let something like that have missing pieces, it’s ok if there are missing moments during the rest of the movie but if you can just effectively mold the climax so it gets the feeling that you want then I feel like you have accomplished a really good movie. Just to clarify though, you should not overdo the emotional thing because then it becomes obvious what you are trying to do.

I think that’s it, except for the ending because it was lame. It was very lame. I know that it is a classic to have two figures riding off to somewhere unknown on horseback but it is way over used and boring. I wanted something more, maybe with more of a BANG! What can you do right? Endings, like the climax are vital in a movie and they HAVE to be good or else everything that led up to that isn’t as good as it seemed. That’s it… all in all, this movie is not a must see and it was not an I LOVE THIS MOVIE!!!!!! type of thing it was more like and “oh… that was ok” because it was ok but it was not great.

Real Teen Rating ~ C+ : Just Average

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When In Rome - Kristin Bell, Josh Duhamel, and Will Arnett

The Gist

When in Rome
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Beth (Kristin Bell) is busy organizing an important art show when she finds out her sister is getting married in Rome in only a few days. Hoping that her art show planning can wait a few days, she flies out to Rome to see her sister get married. At the reception Beth meets Nick Beamon, best man at the wedding and best friends with the groom. He – one of the only non-foreign ones there – is actually nice to her despite the other guests’ dislike for her. She immediately likes him and talks with him all night. But after going to get some champagne and coming back to find him kissing another girl, Beth leaves the wedding all-together. A little bitter and a lot drunk. On her way back to her hotel she sees a beautiful water fountain – the fountain of Love. Legend has it that if you throw a coin in the fountain you find love. So Beth, instead of throwing a coin in, takes a few for herself instead. She thinks nothing of it until her sister tells her some startling news. If you take coins from the fountain, the people whose coins you took will fall in love with you. Now complete strangers are following her around, telling her they’re in love with her. Problem is, one of those “strangers” is Nick. How can she tell if his supposed love for her is just a spell? She must return the coins to their previous owners to find out who’s in love with her for real and who’s just under a spell.


What We Think

Reviewed by Dream Catcher

Run Time: 91 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

It took me literally FOREVER to work up the enthusiasm to write that gist. I watched the movie when it first came out on onDemand. And, as I’m sure you know, that was MANY MONTHS ago. So the movie was terrible. Down-right, no-exceptions TERRIBLE. It was boring, it was cheesy and it was not funny. Especially for a romantic-comedy. I mean as far as romantic-comedies go lately, none of them are very romantic or funny. This was no exception. The plot, first off, was just bad. I may have looked quirky and funny from the trailers, but it was such a disappointment. The same things just kept happening over and over. She ran into one of the guys that was under a spell, she ran into the guy she was falling in love with, she had another incident with a love-spell victim, she went on a date with the guy she was falling in love with, and so on. I got bored multiple times throughout the movie. I kept glancing at the clock and wondering when it was going to end. Not a good thing to think while watching a movie. Right near the end was the most ridiculous part. At that point my mind was screaming end all ready! Finally it did, but if I recall correctly the ending was cheesy and overrated.  The movie would have been a bit redeemable had the characters been tolerable. But no.  The writers of this movie’s script were determined to get nothing right.  The main character Beth was just…I’m not even sure. Just something was a bit off about her. That and the fact that she refused to make up her mind. I love him, no I don’t, yes I do, no I don’t, yes I do. Over and over and over.  Indecisive characters really annoy me while watching a movie. So when I realized that Beth, main character and coin-stealer extraordinaire, lacked the basic survival skill known as decision-making I lost a lot of faith in the movie. And I hadn’t had a lot of faith to begin with. In addition to Beth being a disappointing, lack-luster character…well. EVERY character was disappointing and lack-luster. All of the love-spell victims were just a bit too weird. I know the whole point was for them to be weird – they were the movie’s comedic focal point – but you just couldn’t relate to them at all. The love-interest was okay. But that’s the problem. OKAY does not make for a good love-interest character. It just makes them forgettable. As far as the acting went, none of it was that bad. It was just the script was so bad that the actors had such little to work with. Kristin Bell was actually pretty good – like she is in most of the movies she’s in. I just think that she has to learn to choose the right movies to be in. She’s been in a few really mediocre movies. I think if she chose to be in more promising movies she could actually be a pretty good actress. Overall this movie was a complete disappointment. From the previews it looked so sweet and funny and unique.  I really wish it had been. But it certainly wasn’t.

Real Teen Rating~ D- : I wouldn’t bother at all.

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Megamind - Will Ferrell, Brad Pitt, Jonah Hill, and Tina Fey

The Gist

“You are destined for…”. could mean a lot of things.  It could be you are destined for evil, love, good will, but young Megamind filled in the blank as GREATNESS when his father placed him in the space pod heading for earth.  On his way there Megamind crashes into another baby in a space pod….Metroman.  From that moment on they became rivals destined to battle for all eternity.  Almost every week they have a battle in which Megamind gets his butt kicked and sent back to his liar.  When Megamind comes up with a brillant plan to get rid of his rival he quickly acts on it and and succeeds in destroying Metroman forever.  The  people of Metrocity run and find shelter and fast as they can because Megamind has taken over the town.  Now Megamind is on a rampage destroying everything in sight and there is only one person who can stop him, and that is Roxanne Ritchi.  While the rest of the town has given up this former girlfriend/newscaster of Metroman’s will stop at nothing until she finds out how to stop Megamind and save the town of Metrocity!


What We Think

Reviewed by The North Star

Run Time: 96 Minutes

Rating: PG

I saw this movie a couple of weekends ago thinking it was going to be terrible.  The commercials made it look cheesy/predictable/all the elements for a bad movie.  At the end I was pleasantly surprised!  It wasn’t the best movie in the entire world but it wasn’t so bad as to walk out.  I actually found myself laughing at most of the parts that were supposed to be funny.  Megamind would often pronounce words completely wrong but he would think he was right so you would have to guess which word he was meaning to say, which I thought was funny.  The good thing about this movie was that they had a character everyone loved and that was…minion.  Minion was Megamind’s best friend from the start who was always there helping him at the drawing board when his plans failed.  Minion was just so kind and lovable it was really hard to believe that he was evil. Now…..the least liked character.  Roxanne Ritchie. I love Tina Fey but her character in this movie really, really bothered me.  It was obvious from the first scene she was going to have a romantic relationship with Megamind at some point and she just treated Megamind like dirt.  Sure, he is a super villain but he has feelings to and she never even gave him a chance!   Her character also thought she knew everything, when in fact she knew almost nothing.  In short, she was a conceited know-it-all who cared way to much about looks.

Now on to the magical thing called plot!!  This was definitely an original plot line.  With a normal movie the hero and the villain would just fight the whole movie and it could go either way as to who wins in the end but in the first 30minutes of the movie, they eliminated one of those variables which was the hero.  To see how everything unfolded after that was really interesting and so for that the writers get a thumbs up!  The only complaint I have about the plot is that at parts it could get slow and I found myself staring at the ceiling waiting for something interesting to happen.

In the end this was a pretty decent movie and better than expected but I wouldn’t recommend it!

Real Teen Rating~ C+ :  Just Average

Reviewed by Dream Catcher
I love this movie. When I first saw it, awhile ago, I was in agreement with North Star. I didn't think it was the greatest thing ever and I didn't think it was terrible. I just thought it was okay. Recently I watched it again with my dad and my little sister. I found the jokes to be funnier than I remembered. I remembered it being a very average animated movie, nothing more, nothing less. But suddenly it has become me and my sister's favorite inside joke. It's a dorky kind of guilty pleasure movie where you quote stupid yet somehow funny lines and post pictures of scenes to your sister's wall. Maybe that's just me. Inside jokes and weird sisters aside, the script of this movie is actually pretty good. Some of the dialogue is actually pretty witty and, while on the outside it may appear a kid's movie, adults (and teens) could enjoy the jokes, too. Will Ferrell is hilarious as Megamind because once you know it's him the voice is obvious, but you wouldn't realize it was him unless someone told you. Tina Fey is always funny. And Jonah Hill played the most awkward character ever and he was perfect at it.  Overall I think it's a funny movie worth watching at least once. Trust me, it'll get a laugh or two out of most of you.

Real Teen Rating ~ B+ : Worth Watching!

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Killers - Katherine Heigl, Ashton Kutcher, and Tom Selleck

The Gist

Killers
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Jen Kornfeldt (Katherine Heigl), recently dumped, decides to go on vacation to France with her parents as planned. There she meets Spencer Aimes, superspy killer and man of her dreams. After asking  Jen out on a date, Spencer realizes he wants out of killing people for a living. The next day, when his boss tries to contact him, Spencer tells him that he’s quitting. Three years later Jen and Spencer are happily married with normal jobs and a perfect life.  The day before Jen is scheduled to go on a business trip, Spencer gets a message from his old boss.  His boss tells him that Spencer’s old job wasn’t something you could quit. Once an agent always an agent. And if Spencer didn’t come back to his old job, then he’d become the enemy. And people would be sent to kill him. But Spencer doesn’t want to believe him, so instead he ignores him. The next day, Jen goes off to her business trip, but halfway there, she realizes that spending time with her husband on his birthday was more important than going to work. So she turns back around. Meanwhile, back at the house, Spencer’s “best friend” tries to kill him. Because there’s a twenty million dollar bounty on his head. When Jen gets home she’s shocked to find her husband being attacked by (and attacking) his best friend. There, she learns the truth about the man she married and has to tag along as he tries to figure out why everyone is trying to kill him. Surviving all of the killers isn’t the hard part. Jen has to find a way to forgive her husband for his disloyalty and get past all of their deferences along the way.


What We Think

Reviewed by Dream Catcher

Run Time: 96 Minutes

Rating: PG-13

You know what I think? This movie stunk. Completely. To begin, writing the gist was kind of hard because I could hardly come up with even a scrap of plot to work with! And you know what? I realized that while Katherine Heigl seems to be in a lot of movies, none of those movies are at all memorable. They’re all just kind of there, with her performance being good, but nothing special. This movie was no exception.The only reason I watched it at all was because there was nothing else on onDemand that either I hadn’t already seen, or was PG-13 or under. I thought (at the time) that it might be an okay movie. You know, not those knock-your-socks-off kind, but the hey-that-wasn’t-too-bad! kind. But anyways, I was utterly disappointed. Like I said before, one of the more obvious flaws of this movie was it’s lack of plot. There really was nothing. They killed a bunch of people, they almost got killed by a bunch of people, there were lots of guns and even more ammo and of course the stupid I-don’t-even-know-you-anymore fighting between the marvelous main married couple. Then all of the sudden the movie was over and I was watching the credits roll. What!? So that alone earns it at least a C-. But no. Then the characters had to go and be annoyingly predictable. They transformed from this loving, perfect couple to two people who couldn’t stand each other. Then they began switching back and forth randomly. Sometimes they were lovey-dovey. Next moment they were arguing. I could have handled it once or twice but after the fourth stupid argument I was bored and really sick of it. I mean come on! You’re married! You must have gotten married for a reason, right? SO STOP FIGHTING! I kept thinking that. But no matter how angrily my mind screamed it, the characters on the screen continued to bicker. Finally, the ending was just all-around bad. It wasn’t memorable. The movie ended and I thought, Oh. It’s over. Okay. Bad thing to have in your mind at the end of a movie. That is destined to make a not-so-nice review…viola! Overall, the acting wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t any work of genius either. It was a movie that wasn’t worth seeing a first time, so if you see it on onDemand, or Netflix or movie rental store just ignore it. I think it was a movie that should just be ignored.

Real Teen Rating~ D- : I wouldn’t bother at all

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