Grenade Music Video- Bruno Mars

Real Teen Award
-Best Music Video of 2010

Reviewed by ShoreWhisperer

Song Time: 4 Minutes and 10 Seconds


I don’t really watch a lot of music videos anymore, and they have gone out of style since the nineties. Lady Gaga has brought them back with her original style and futuristic videos people have started l watching videos, the rise of YouTube has helped too. Bruno Mars has really good videos. My sister has a phase where she listened to “Just the Way You Are” non-stop for like two weeks, and it got really annoying but I got attached to the song none-the-less. His first video I saw was “Just the Way You Are” and thought that it was adorable, but then once my sister weeded herself off of one obsession she was soon onto another one where it was aimed at the song “Grenade”, sadly that obsession has not been ended so I still hear it night and day, but that’s alright. Anyway, she showed me the video and I knew that it had to win best Music Video award and it did! So, the video is really cute. The song in general is so sad, and adorable all at the same time. The  video is the same. I love how Bruno cannot be separated from  his piano because it is his trademark symbol. I love the concept of walking a thousand miles in turmoil for the one you love and then its so sad. He gets rejected by this stupid women who doesn’t love him and will not ever love him but through all of that misery he still loves her. Pobre Bruno! The end is the worst and its really sad, he cannot accept the fact that she will never love him and so he kills himself, but jumping in front of a train, with his piano. Even though this video is not the most creative video it does deserve some recognition because it is acted really well and gets the message of the song really well and it was altogether a good video, very pleasurable to watch (except for the end). So this gets the top video for a reason.

Real Teen Rating~ A- : Impressive, but not perfect

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First Step 2 Forever: My Story - Justin Bieber

The Gist

First Step 2 Forever
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I feel like the gist of this one is pretty self-explanatory, but for those of you who would like the explanation, here we go.  This book is an autobiography of sorts.  Written by none other than pop-sensation Justin Bieber, First Step 2 Forever: My Story chronicles his rise from small town boy to world-wide wonder. 


What We Think

Reviewed by Living Destiny

Number of Pages: 240
 Before I start the review, I just want to get this out there: I did not read this under my own free will.  I was brutally forced into reading this by…well actually all three of my fellow reviewers.  So I read it.  In one sitting.  In three hours.  If I hadn’t been reading it under duress, I would have put this off for at least three months, and then stretched out the reading of it for at least one more month.  So the fact that I’m sitting here reviewing this right now is all kinds of incredible.

Ok.  Review time.  I wasn’t exactly going into this book with high hopes.  I mean, it’s an autobiography from a kid who has more music credits to his name than years in his life.  Of course, it does have less than 300 pages, so I guess the length corresponds to his teenage-ness, but it’s still pretty bizarre.  But I was still incredulous, because there’s only so much life you can jam into sixteen years.

So, as for the writing style, it’s not too great.  I wasn’t expecting it to be stellar or anything, because it wasn’t written by a famous author but a famous singer.  And, for once, it was actually about what I had expected.  However, it wasn’t extraordinary by any stretch of the imagination.  I understand the theory of writing like you would speak, to make the writing seem more like a real conversation, but there are some things you really don’t write down in book form.  Like ‘hella’.  Or putting things in all caps locks or in bold to make a point.  That’s ok occasionally, but once every five pages is just annoying.  Sometimes it seemed like he was trying too hard to make his folksy swagger shine through his writing.  If you’re trying that hard to get something across, it’s clearly not working.  So you should stop.  Immediately.

I found myself laughing at a lot of the book.  In not a good way.  And a small part of me felt bad for it, but most of me just found it funny.  I think I was laughing at the pictures.  This book should be a picture book, not a novel.  There was a picture on every other page, and sometimes there was one big picture spanning two pages.  I never wanted to see so many pictures of Justin Bieber, and there they were, condensed into a 300 page book.  Also, the font was huge.  For no apparent reason.  If this book was published as an actual novel, and not a picture book for tweens, I doubt it would break 120 pages.  Oh, and the book jacket is a secret double agent.  When you take it off and unfold it, it becomes a Justin Bieber poster.  Does anyone else see that as a bad sign?  This book was written for the following reasons: 80% publicity, 14% actual interest in writing it, and 6% striving to put out more pictures of ‘the Biebs’.  And I found those pictures to be pretty hilarious.  On one page, there’s this three picture montage of Justin Bieber without his shirt, beautifully showcasing his squishy mid-section.  And as an added bonus, he seems to be grabbing his crotch (in the classic masculine pose).  Hooray!

I know I’ve been bashing his book, but I do have to give him some credit for it.  First of all, writing a book is a difficult task to accomplish, especially an autobiography.  Since he doesn’t have any experience with writing, it makes it more impressive.  Also, there were a few sections in there that made me smile in a not-spiteful way.  Which was nice.  I made fun of him a lot while reading this, but I appreciated some of the things he said.  The best part of this whole book is definitely his story.  He really did come up from nothing.  His story proves that you truly can do anything if you have passion for it.  Writing it into a book gets it out there for everyone to see.  This is one of those stories that can inspire anyone to shoot for the stars, even if your dream seems too far away.  I really admire what he has accomplished for himself.  So that’s a pleasant plus.

Just some random facts: he references Chuck Norris at least seven times throughout the story.  Clearly this kid has a Chuck Norris obsession.  Also, some of those pictures make him look extremely feminine.  I’m not trying to be offensive, but it’s really true.  Sorry.  And just one more: he can’t count.  At one point he’s making a list, and he skips the number five.  He comments on that in number seven, but it doesn’t make up for the fact that he went from four to six.  At least he was self-deprecating.  It’s always good when you can laugh at yourself.  Alright, it’s 11:45 and I totally just said ‘ they’re beliebing’.  This book has brainwashed me.  I’m probably going to dream about Justin Bieber tonight.  When I finally get to sleep.  No more!  I’m done!  I ‘beliebe’ that this review is over!

Real Teen Rating~ C -: Read it if you’re bored…

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Mike & Molly - CBS

Real Teen Award
- Worst Show in 2010

The Gist

Mike is a police officer, alone and a bit overweight.  Molly is a forth-grade teacher, alone and also a bit overweight.  The highlight of both of their weeks is a Overeaters Anonymous meeting where they can cope and joke about their “obesity” to others who struggle.  At one of the meetings Mike notices Molly when she is giving a speech in the front of the room.  He tries to ask her out that night but chickens out and just saying gibberish.  The next  he realizes what a big mistake he had made and decides to visit her at her school and ask her out.  When he gets there he finally works up the courage and asks her out.  She says yes and throughout the rest of the series the audience travels through their relationship from beginning to end, whether that means marriage, break-up or something else. 


What We Think

Reviewed by The North Star

Number of Pages: 0 (and 18 episodes)

I saw a commercial for this show and thought that I might give this a try because it looked somewhat funny and it had all this critics saying how amazing it was so I thought why not.  I went to my DVR and set up a recording and was excited when I saw the first episode had recorded.  After watching it I think my brain has literally melted.  This show was literally unwatchable but I thought to myself that maybe the pilot was just bad and that it would get better…… I was very wrong.  I think this show actually got worse if that is even possible.  The whole time they just make fat jokes and they aren’t even funny they are just offensive.  I mean regular people can’t make fun of overweight people or it is just mean but overweight people can make fun of overweight people because they are just laughing at themselves which is fine.  Well in this show when they make fun of themselves it is still somehow OFFENSIVE!!  Which I didn’t think was possible but they somehow found a way.  The romance in this show is just plain awkward….I mean really awkward.  Before and after each date Mike asks his best friend/police partner for advice about Molly and what to do to impress her and etc.  First off, his friend lives in his mother’s house and hasn’t had a girlfriend in years so why would you be taking advice from him in the first place!!  Second, you should not be asking your best guy friend advice for every date I mean I can get it if you need help on a few dates but EVERY date that is a big no-no!  The stupidest thing about this show though would have to be Molly’s sister Victoria.  She is this drug-addict/drunk who just complains the time about how much her life stinks.  If you ask me she should just sober up and get a job and a steady boyfriend.  I know this is a hard thing to do but I mean if you’re gonna complain then it must be pretty bad.

On a positive note once in a RARE occasion this show will make me chuckle a bit which is what saves it from the ultimate fate that is zero.  I am sad to report that I do not even think about watching this show any more because after 4 episodes I gave it a fair chance and it was TERRIBLE all four times.

Real Teen Rating~ F: I wouldn’t waste my time

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Like A G6- Far East Movement Ft. The Cataracts

Real Teen Award
- Most Catchy Song of 2010

Reviewed by ShoreWhisperer

Song Time: 3 Minutes and 36 Seconds

Like A G6
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This song is not something that I would normally listen to. I don’t like this song but I will say that it is catchy, the beat is awesome and fits under my categories of a toe-tapper and also a head-bobber. Which is pretty good, the music in general is not good. This is not music, this is weird trashy techno music that is not under the definition on music in my opinion. Occasionally this can be decent and this song fits under this category because it did win the award for most catchy song of the year. I don’t like the lyrics to this song because it is not even punny. I know that the song chorus is a pun but really it does not even make sense. When you use the word “fly” in this context it means cool, not actually flying and a G6 is a jet plane so therefore these two things do not go together at all. I see the pun but I don’t know how this is a witty or even good pun. Please, if someone would like to enlighten me on this subject feel free to do so. This song is a good song to hear on the radio because it is a good song to hear in the car when you are tired of hearing dull music that people think is good to put on the radio, when really it’s really just putting me to sleep because it’s the same song (not literally) all the time. This song is just a nice way to be tapping the steering wheel or jamming in the passenger seat but you will never see this song on my MP3. I do not understand why this song made it so big but because I can’t seem to change the large assumption of what music “really” is then I will judge this song in the opinion of the majority of this world. This song is just like every song now-a-days but it is better because it is so “punny”, so that’s why this song is getting a better rating than- in my opinion- it deserves.

Real Teen Rating~ C+ : You could go either way on this. . .

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Black and Yellow- Wiz Khalifa

Real Teen Award
- Worst Single of 2010

Reviewed by ShoreWhisperer

Song Time: 3 Minutes and 37 Seconds 

Black and Yellow
Buy it here and support our blog

This is the worse song that could have ever been made. First off, I hate rap but certain songs of Eminem I can stand. If you listen to certain rap songs it can sound nice and can in certain times be what really is: poetry. In this day and age though you can not expect that, rapping although not easy, can be done by anyone. My brother raps along to the songs as well as the rappers in the song, so why isn’t he wearing all the bling and making millions? This song is one of the worst rap songs that I have ever heard. I do not understand what kind of person comes up with these lyrics but they are not only offensive but a disgrace to the American culture. We pride ourselves that all men equal, but when you have people calling each other the “n” word in songs and insulting lesbians in a form of media, we can hardly say that we are equal. This song has the “n” word four times in it, please tell me when saying that word once is even acceptable? I have listened to this song multiple times, because I have been forced into car rides to school that have involved this song being played multiple times. Not only that but there is a part where they call lesbians weird? Excuse me, can you prove that? That is also not an appropriate thing to say especially in an industry that you have vulnerable children and teenagers listening to. They are going to start thinking that it is alright to say these kind of things, which it is not. Also, you have to get songs looked at before you even record it. This song is one of the most offensive things I have ever heard, even hearing it makes me feel disgusted.  Who was the music producer that edited this song because I don’t see how someone could see that this song isn’t offensive. That’s all I have to say about this song. Do NOT listen to it because it will just infect the lives of another thousand people if this song is passed on to people and it will end up corrupting the rest of the American population.

Real Teen Rating~ O: Yeah thats a zero, don’t even go there…

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Bruno Mars- In General

Real Teen Award
-Best Male Artist of 2010

Reviewed  by ShoreWhisperer

Number of CDs: 1

When I first heard of Bruno Mars I thought that he was going to be like every other artist in that is played on the hit radio stations. Happily, I couldn’t be more wrong, he is actually a really good artist. He is a piano player which is a check in my book and I also give him props because I know hard it is to play and sing at the same time. I also love his songs. The first song that I heard by him was  ”Just The Way You Are” and I loved it, the music video because it was really creative in a good way, and then the actual music was good too. He is bringing integrity back to the music industry. Now I know that he is in jail and that probably isn’t the place for the only future for the music industry to start his career but he is the only way to keep the popular music industry to go into an even deeper depression that it is now because of what people like to sing now (which isn’t even singing).  When I heard that Marry You was his song that won me over because although its popular music and it sounds like a song that would have been recorded while our parents were in high school. I loved the whole style of the song and though the lyrics were a little strange it was okay. Then I heard Grenade and there was no way that I couldn’t love Bruno Mars, his music his beyond decent and his songs in general are really cute, I love all of them. If you haven’t hears Bruno Mars (which is nearly impossible unless you live in a box), then you need to go listen to him, pronto. He is the future of music and he has major talent, his is someone who should be watched because I bet that he will be becoming really big after he gets out of jail of course.

Real Teen Rating~ A : Definitely worth checking out

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Jason Castro- Jason Castro

Reviewed by ShoreWhisperer

Song Time: 27 Minutes and 26 Seconds

Jason Castro
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Let’s Just Fall in Love Again-11/10- This song is just so cute that you have to love it. This is the type of song that sounds really good on his voice. It’s playful and modern and upbeat. The lyrics are my favorite, they aren’t extremly creative but they are definitly cute. The cool thing about the song is that he doesn’t use any weird techno stuff, it’s an acoustic guitar, piano, tambourine, drums and a bass. The sound is incredible, this song is also a dance alone in your room, kind of song. This song is a definite listen to song!


This Heart of Mine- 10/10- I am digging the awesome acoustic guitar in this song, it just sounds so natural and beautiful. I love his lyrics (which he did write, by the way), they are so  forward and they go with his instrumental parts so well. This is what I consider a toe-tapping song, I don’t want to dance but it’s one of those songs in romantic comedies that make you tap your foot and sway in your seat. I like the beginning the most it’s just so pure. This is a good song to have and listen to when your down or something, it’s just makes you happy when you are listening to it.


That’s What I’m Here For- 8/10- Again, he has that awesome acoustic guitar that continues throughout the song. He also has this really gorgeous orchestra part in the background, I love listening to it, I get goosebumps. His lyrics aren’t as good as I was expecting in this song, they are reptitive but they aren’t bad, I do like them. It’s a short song so I feel it needed a little more change because he says the title a lot and that gets a little annoying at points.


Love Uncompromised- 9/10- This song sounds a little country at the beginning and through parts of the song. I don’t know what it is but the sultry kind of sound is really cool and I was liking it a lot. The lyrics are really straight forward but that was alright for this song because his voice made it work with song. I liked it but it wasn’t my favorite song, I think because it’s in between being able to dance to it and being able to slow dance to it. It was that awkward tempo that I would start swaying but then it would be to slow and that’s my only complaint.


Closer-8/10- This song doesn’t have the really good acoustic guitar but it does have a sense of rock. It’s in the middle which resembles something like Train would do. I did like the song though, it’s really creative in the sense that it’s different from his other songs and what he is doing and going out of what seemed to be his comfort zone. The lyrics are cute and the “woo-hoo’s” are adorable, and kind of make the song better. This is categorized as a head-bobbing song, you do the little head-bob when you hear this song trying to do it so no one sees it. That means the song is a pretty good “rock” song, if you start the head-bobbing something good is going on.


You Can Always Come Home- 7/10- This song has an awesome guitar part, and the duet is really nice too. The lyrics are a little plain for what he usually has and that was sad. This is not my favorite, the singing is what is good about this song but it doesn’t stand out with the other songs.


It Matters to Me-10/10-There is another awesome guitar part in this song, I like listening to all his different parts of the instrumental parts. The next best part of this song is the lyrics and his voice, I love how he portrays the lyrics, he can sound “rock and roll-ish” but then sound folky at the same time and that’s what this song reminded me of, it’s a love song and the guitar makes it sound like folk but then the chorus sounds almost like rock. Then the lyrics aren’t really creative but inlike the other songs that I didn’t like the lyrics to these sound so genuine and pure and unrefined that they make the song really nice.


Hallelujah-10/10- This is a song originally done by Leonard Cohen and redone by many people, most notably Rufus Wainright. This song is so perfect for Jason Castro because he can rock out on the guitar in any key that makes his voice sound so rich and pretty, which is what he does. He incorporates Jeff Buckley’s version when he added the electric guitar and that’s when the song made my list of favorite versions of this song. My only complaint is that I wish he had done more of the verses. I have memorized five of the verses and I wish he had added more of them in. The best part of the song is the end when he adds harmonies and counter melodies and makes the whole song wrap up nicely and then I get goosebumps and it’s over. This is a must have song if you love Jason Castro or this song.


Real Teen Rating~ B+ : Check it out sometime

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Michael Bublé- Crazy Love

Real Teen Award
- Best Album of 2010
-ShoreWhisperer Award

Reviewed by ShoreWhisperer

Song Time: 47 Minutes and 34 Seconds

Crazy Love
Buy it here and support our blog

Cry Me A River- 10/10- This song was written in the early fifties for Ella Fitzgerald by Arthur Hamilton. It has been covered by every jazz legend imaginable. This song is ageless, obviously. Michael’s cover is very modern and fun. The beginning is crazy good, his whole arrangement of the song is fantastic. His voice and the band just blend together amazingly. He makes this dramatic smooth and intense at the same time.


All of Me- 10/10- This is another song that has been done by everyone: Frank Sinatra, Billie Holiday, Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald, for example. This song is one of my favorites. I’ve listened to many different arrangements, his models a mix between Billie Holiday and Sinatra. I love this song in general but this is one of my favorite versions. His instumental parts are always to die for, I particuarly love the bass part in this song. It just makes you want to tap your foot. My favorite part is that he makes the song modern. Sadly, no one wants to listen to the signature jazz gods like Louis Armstrong and Frank Sinatra. Michael Buble is bringing their songs back and making them popular with people which is inspiring.


Georgia on my Mind – 9/10- This is another song that has been covered by many artists most notably Ray Charles. Michael’s version does not measure up to his but it is comparable. The song is a classic, just like the rest of them. If you like this song listen to Ray Charles’s version of it because Michael’s version is  more modern. It really is a great cover of it, it captures what the song is really like and I love listening to it. This song displays Michael’s talent, it’s awesome, I get goosebumps listening to it, I hope you do too.


Crazy Love- 10/10- This is a song by Van Morrison, this is a gorgeous ballad. I like Michael’s version better and it was a good choice to make this the cover song because it is truly amazing. This song is just natural, there is really soft music and his voice and that’s it. There isn’t any weird electronic sounding stuff, because that would be unnecessary. This is real music, listen to it.


Haven’t Met You Yet- 10/10- If you haven’t met this song yet then you should go introduce yourself (sorry about the cheesy pun, it was needed). This song has been extremly popular. I love this song too. It’s upbeat and catchy. I find myself singing it around the house, it’s worth listening too. This song is a cross between modern music and jazz and every good thing in the world, that’s all that needs to be said.


All I Do is Dream of You- 8/10- This song is another old jazz classic, it was in Singin’ in the Rain, and done another dozen of jazz legends. This version, is really classy and fun. I like the “wee-oo-wee-oo-wee’s” at the beginning, it makes me want to live in the fifties. This song is really just classy and old-fashioned, it’s cute.


Hold On- 9/10-This is an original song and it gives me goosebumps and makes me want to cry. It’s so pretty, and the way he sings it is so easy on the ears. His voice is like jumping into a bed of fluffy feather pillows. It’s just so soft and nice you can’t help but sigh. That’s how this song makes me feel, I hope you feel the same, it’s a good song, both modern and classy. This is good music.


Heartache Tonight- 8/10- This song is orginally done by the Eagles. That just shows that Michael does everything, and he makes it his own. I like both versions of the song, Michael’s version is more jazzier and classier, but the Eagles’ version is just as good, in it’s own way. This is a very different song from the other songs on the album and it stands out in a good way. I like how he incorporates the rock side of the original song into his version and it still fits in his version, it’s amazing.


You’re Nobody Till Somebody Loves You-10/10- This is a song most notably by Dean Martin though it’s been done by many others. This song hopefully gives everyone goosebumps, it’s a classic and Michael does it mostly textbook style, which is perfect because it is already good and he only enhances it with his voice and other jazzy little things that only makes the song better. This is a really good song, listen to it!


Baby (You’ve Got What it Takes)- 8/10- This is originally a chart-topping R&B classic from the 60′s. This is a really good song, it’s jazzy and heavy and perfect. I love them singing together, it’s a match made in jazz heaven. This is just a great duet in general, so listen to every version because they are all really good.


At This Moment- 11/10- This is a song by Billy Vera & the Beaters. This a really depressing song, and I am just looking at Michael’s version of this song, because he makes me cry listening to this because his voice just captures the entire song and makes you want to hug this guy. I don’t know how you could stop love someone like this, but whoever he is singing to is seriously messed up because this is the most amazing singer in the world. Not to mention, that he is attractive and really loves her. Seriously, I don’t know how this song could not move you it’s just so beautiful.


Stardust- 10/10- This is a song by Hoagy Carmichael, it’s just smooth and pretty and jazzy. I love this song, I could listen to it all day and still love it. I want to dance whenever I hear it, especially this version because the group Naturally 7 is just as good as Michael and their voices make this song really unique. I feel like I was transported back into the 20′s in the midst of the jazz renaissance. It’s a really unique song.


Whatever it Takes- 8/10- This song was originally by Ron Sexsmith and he is the person who is featured in this song. I love the spanish influences in this song, it changes it up the tone of the album and makes it even more diverse than it already is. The arrangement is really smooth and classy. I love everything about this song because the spanish enhancements make me want to mambo or something like that. It is a really good way to complete the album because you think that it can’t get any better and then you hear this and your life is then complete. Another great song.


Some Kind of Wonderful- 10/10- This is a bonus track and it’s amazing, I want to dance and sing with him and just have a little pocket Michael (if that isn’t creepy) with me all  the time, you can’t not love him while listening to this song. I loved and this bonus track makes me love him even more, if that is even possible. Listen to this song, it not only completes the entire album it makes you want to listen to more Michael Bublé.

Real Teen Rating~ A+ : Look it up right NOWWW!!!!!

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Camelot- Original Broadway Cast

Reviewed by ShoreWhisperer
Song Time: 49 Minutes and 35 Seconds  

Camelot
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This is a classic in any book of broadway shows. The show was produced by Frederick Lowe and Alan Jay Lerner. It follows the famous story of King Arthur and his infamous round table. It also highlights their quest for equality and the perfect society while dealing with Guenevere and Lancelot’s scandalous romance.


Overture-8/10- This is a very typical overture. I have heard very many overtures and the really good ones are amazing but this one is just kind of boring. They play three songs throughout the whole thing. An overture is a mixture of all the songs usually and that isn’t what this is. Although, what I do like about it is that it shows the three sides of the story, the romance, the proper side of the court in search of the perfect society, and Arthur who is just everywhere throughout the play. So it does a good job summing up the whole show in a three-minute and sixteen second song.


March(parade)-2/10- This song is just instrumental music from the pit orchestra of the show and it is not something that I would want to listen to. I understand that this is an old musical and will admit that the percussion part is pretty awesome in this song but if I was sitting through a show and this is the first song of the show I would be asleep in two seconds and they would not have my attention at all for the rest of the show.


I Wonder What the King is Doing Tonight?-2/10- I don’t like he starts out talking, it’s boring, and the song lyrics are silly and really quite dull. I don’t care what the king is doing and they make me laugh because lyrics are just so stupid. The song is really short and I feel that they could have made this talking. If the actor is good enough he should be able to get his feelings across the same way and in this case it would have been more entertaining that way.


The Simple Joys of maidenhood 5/10- The beginning of the song is a little strange and it is usually cut if you are singing it as a solo for anything but the show. This song genuinely makes me laugh because the lyrics are meant to be funny and they are actually funny. Guenevere is just so juvenile its funny. There is one problem though, the song goes nowhere. There is one dynamic level the whole time and that gets boring. It’s one level the whole time and so you stop listening to the singing and concentrate on the lyrics. If the lyrics weren’t so funny then the song would be a total bore.


Camelot- 5/10- Beware!!! This song gets stuck in your head constantly. It is a very catchy tune and thank god that the title song of the show is actually decent because that is always very important. But like all the previous songs there is no dynamic changes and the part of the song that is actually pretty good (the orchestra) is tuned out and again you listen to just the lyrics that are pretty good.


Follow Me- 1/10- This is the most boring song in the entire show. Like the rest of the songs it goes nowhere and this time the lyrics are not there to save the day. The song is boring and the orchestration isn’t even that good there is no exciting parts to it so it just puts you to sleep. Though the melody of the song is pretty the singer sings it very well.


C’est Moi- 6/10- This song is actually funny and I can actually say that I can like this song at points. The music is very repetitive at points and that gets boring as always but the lyrics are hysterical. This is the perfect way to introduce Lancelot. He is so arrogant and just way to good at the same time. You have to listen to the lyrics to appreciate this song. Otherwise it is not funny, the whole song is ironic if you know the rest of the show, which most people do. This is just a filler song though, a plot mover so it isn’t an important featured song.


The Lusty Month of May- 7/10- This is the first song we hear the ensemble and it’s a perfect song for that. This is quite a strange song. I have never heard anyone be so happy about being intimate with people. It’s really they are too happy, and the lyrics are just really creepy, I mean who sings about that stuff? Well that’s my rant for the day… I guess the song is ok. The chorus part is really fun and it’s like I can picture them picking flowers and wrapping a maypole. The tra-la-la’s are cute and makes the song a little a bit better.


Then You May Take Me To Fair-2 /10- This song is another stupid song, I don’t understand what the point of the song is. The lyrics are funny and are quite witty if you put it in the context of Guenevere’s first song. This song is even stranger when you know that she has a husband that she is in love with. She is using to get back at her husband but the song is boring and repetitive like the rest of the songs and so it puts you to sleep again. There is no change in the song and it sometimes left out in performances of the show. So this is another pointless song.


How To Handle A Woman- 5/10- This song is getting a fairly higher score than it deserves because the lyrics are actually really nice and I think every man in this world needs to listen to this song! Anyways, the rest of the song is nice it’s not spectacular and I would most likely change it if it played on my MP3 player. I do like the orchestration but then as always its the same tune over and over. I think that the person who wrote this show sometimes got too tired with this show and only gave it half his effort because there is no change in the music ever it’s always the same. Songs need to change to grasp a persons interest and these songs do not do that.


Before I Gaze at You Again- 3/10- This song is about Lancelot and how she has to be faithful to her husband so she cannot love Lancelot. She has to be able to look at him without showing any signs of their love. This song is a bore. I will not lie, I do like listening to this song. This show is three hours long. I have seen it and the dialogue is not that interesting so this song would most likely put me to asleep in the theater. That’s because, for one, I have been sitting in a dark theater for an hour and a half and there has been no intermission yet and two, the song is super slow and super boring. I don’t know about you but that is the recipe for a good nap. It’s just like every other song it doesn’t go anywhere and it’s quiet and demure. On its own though the song is decent and it’s pretty but it doesn’t fit well with the show because of the type of song it is.


If I Would Ever Leave You- 11/10- This is my favorite song in the whole show. There is a reason this is the only recognizable song except for Camelot that people know from this show. Why is this song so good compared to other songs? Well, my complaints about the other songs are fixed in this song. There are changes in the melody, it doesn’t repeat over and over again. Yes, it does repeat but the singer has …wait for it… a DYNAMIC CHANGE! It’s like a foreign concept in this show and this is the one time you hear it. Whenever I hear this song I get chills because the actor who plays Lancelot has to have this great dramatic crescendo and it makes me want to cry if they do it correctly. Then there are the lyrics. These lyrics are really interesting because there are a lot of verses and they all change, so you are always listening to the lyrics. This song is a classic and it deserves that title. You should listen to at least this one song if none of the others.


The Seven Deadly Virtues-8/10- This song is decent and I actually like it. I think it is hilarious, there isn’t much actual singing in it but if it is articulated and emoted right it’s actually pretty good. Of course there is no dynamics and it’s pretty repetitive but the orchestration is amazing in this song. I really love listening to it. The xylophone part is pretty amazing and the rest of it just make the song so that’s why this song gets a good rating. This song is not pretty either it’s an upbeat fun song that I would want to listen to especially because we are in the last tedious hour an a half part of the show.


What Do the Simple Folk Do? – 4/10- This song is really long. It’s the longest song in the entire cd at five minutes and four seconds. Not only is this song long it is excruciatingly repetitive. It’s not a really exciting or fast song either. In its defense, it can be funny if it is acted out right. Personally the four times they try to make each other happy is not really that funny they just end up looking really stupid. That’s probably the point of the song and it’s just wasted on me I guess because I’m thinking more about how Guenevere can be so two-faced. She is in love with Lancelot, and yet she still loves Arthur so why in the world is she with Lancelot. That’s my train of thought during this scene so the song is a little time filler for me to gain my thoughts.


Fie On Goodness- 8/10- This song is the strangest song I have ever heard, it’s stranger than the Lusty Month of May. They talk about so many things that I couldn’t keep track which is ok and for those who are wondering the word “fie” means an annoyance of some kind. So since the lyrics are quite repetitive and I listened to what they were saying and then tuned it out because it was all about women. The song is not actually that bad. There are dynamic changes which made me happy and then there were really cool sound effects like the vocal bagpipes which were awesome. Yeah, this song made me happy, but it is not my favorite by a long shot.


I Loved You Once in Silence- 6/10- This song is extremely depressing, in my opinion. I like this song and would listen to it but not in the context of the show because the show is almost over at this point and it’s another slow song. I don’t want to listen to another slow song. I just would want it to end so I can go the bathroom, personally. Besides, there is NO DYNAMIC CHANGE. I want to go to these actors and yell at them because there are no dynamics. Now I know that I am only a teenager but this ticks me off. I even know how to make a dynamic change, it’s not that hard and these people are a thousand times better than me. If the song had a dynamic changes then it would maybe be as good as If Ever I would Leave You.


Guenevere- 4/10- This song is decent. I would not listen to it on a regular basis but I could see why someone would. The beginning is a little frightening and I find the lyrics upsetting and boring. Then what really gets me is that there is this big ending that would be amazing even with a little crescendo and there is none. The top sopranos stay the same level through the whole song. If they had done that, just that, I would give it a ten just because the way the song is written would highlight that instead of the boring story like lyrics. So, this song makes me angry but if you like this song, I could see how that is possible. This song is just not my favorite.


Finale Ultimo (Camelot Reprise)- 10/10- Just so everyone is clear, I did not give this song a ten rating because it is the last song of the show. This song makes me cry. I know that is really cheesy but it does. The lyrics are really nice and it gives me shivers. I don’t know how the beginning is considered a song rather than lines with background music but it doesn’t matter because it all leads up to the last ensemble parts and I get shivers. Sir Tom has been knighted and then goes to save the legend of Camelot and Arthur steps into battle for his dying kingdom, it’s a really touching scene but the best is the end. It’s the cherry on top for the whole show because they have this amazing crescendo and that’s when the tears come. I think that they were saving all their energy for this one crescendo because it is amazing. It gives the show a little more credit than it would have without this song. This is the real show-stopper and it makes for a really good ending.


Real Teen Rating~ D : Listen to this only if forced to do so…

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Ceiling Fans

Reviewed by The North Star

For the record this review was suggested by Dream and basically defines our category of random.  Recently (because of the suggestion) I have been doing some research on ceiling fans and I was surprised to find that there are a bunch of different types of ceiling fans!! Who would have guessed that!! Certainly not me (: .  You can get Outdoor Ceiling Fans (which are for outside), Flush Mount Hugger Ceiling Fans (which have cool names but are more flat than your average fan), Contemporary Ceiling Fans (I didn’t know there was such a thing…), and there are 19 more types (yes I counted…).  At first I thought they were pretty cool because they keep you from over heating in the summer or all year if you live somewhere warm but as I looked deeper into the subject I found that they are a lot more complicated than I thought.  As I dug even deeper I thought to myself this is kind of ridiculous to have these many different types of  fans for your ceiling and I get it if you want to have things in a room match but I mean people they are CEILING FANS!!!!!!!!!!!   Especially these ones I found called Asian/Oriental Style Ceiling fans and no  offense to the people who designed them but who is going to buy something like that!!  There is also a full website devoted to Ceiling Fans and on the site they have a number to call if your fan breaks and you would like it repaired.  I feel bad for the guy/girl who has that job; he/she probably gets no work because only a handful of people need just their ceiling fan fixed and he/she gets to sit around on the couch all day and watch movies just waiting for work…..Now that I think about maybe I will become and ceiling fan specialist it sounds kind of nice.  On an ending note ceiling fans are nice for a hot summer day but are taken a little to far by some people…
Real Teen Rating~ REALLY!!!!!!!

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Need - Carrie Jones

* New York Times Bestseller

* New York Times Bestselling Author

The Gist: 

Need
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 Zara hasn’t been the same since her step-dad died right in front of her. She’s empty and cold and numb. After months of watching her daughter fade, Zara’s mother decides that she needs a change of venue. So Zara is forced to leave her home in Charlestown and go to live with her step-grandmother in a tiny, remote town in Maine. And to top it all off, someone’s stalking her. Ever since her dad died Zara’s noticed a strange man following her around, pointing at her from a distance. Zara takes being sent to Maine as an exile. The only upside: she’ll be far away from her weird psycho-stalker. But when she gets to the frozen town she feels far from safe. And at school the very next day she find out why. At lunch – out of nowhere – her stalker shows up, pointing at her from the woods outside the school. Zara’s new friends are determined to help her with her mysterious stalker troubles. Issie - Zara’s always-hyper best friend – and Devyn – a wheelchair bound genius – do some research and come up with something that sounds completely crazy: Zara’s stalker is a pixie.


What We Think

Reviewed by Dream Catcher

Number of Pages: 306

So I have a stack of books to-read in my room I fondly (and uncreatively) call the Bookstack. This book was fourth from the bottom because I kept putting it off. Every time I’d finish a book I’d say to myself I should read Need. But then I’d put it back at the bottom of the pile. So finally I got up the guts and decided to read it, once and for all. Why did I stall? I have no idea. No one had told me the book was bad, and I really had no reason to believe it wouldn’t be a good read. But for some reason I was hesitant. I think it was probable because the whole thing was about pixies. I don’t have anything against pixies, but the whole topic of faerie creatures never really appealed to me as much as some other topics did. But I was still willing to give it a chance.

I have decided that the most perfect words to describe it are okay, unmemorable, and lack-luster. The plot was just alright. Nothing remarkable or noteworthy. I mean, the whole thing with pixies is pretty original – when’s the last times you’ve read about a pixie stalker? – but she can’t just ride on mythical creature-ness alone. I was unimpressed. Basically the whole plot was Zara denying over and over again that pixies exist. I believe my friends, I don’t believe my friends, I believe them, I don’t, I belive them, I don’t. Over and over. Everything moved so slowly and hardly anything happened at all. The most action-packed part of the story wasn’t even action-packed. It was exactly like the rest of the story. Like the whole book was one gigantic introduction to set everything up nicely for the rest of the series. Not enough happened for people to actually say there was a plot.

The characters were also very average. Very blah. There was nothing to them, really. Zara White, the main character was always just kind of there. She was boring and lifeless (and not in an I-feel-bad-for-you-because-you’re-so-distraught-you-dad-died way).What was weird was that in addition to being monotonous and dull, she was prone to absurd panic-attacks. She was almost like a contradiction just being herself. Not a very good character and certainly not one that I find easily relatable. Issie as a character was pretty good but, again, nothing that special. She wasn’t as bad as Zara, but she was just there the whole time. Devyn was a pretty good character – like Issie - but (do I really have to say it again?) he wasn’t that great. There was character named Nick who I didn’t bother to mention in the gist because his character is just weird. Massive hottie-hear-throb from the moment Zara lays eyes on him. Half the time he’s the cliché sensitive perfect boyfriend that makes even dead-like Zara swoon (but not me, as a reader) and the other times his short-temper flares up and he’s the biggest jerk ever. He was high maintenance and annoying at best. Not cute or sweet as I’m sure he was intended to be. So overall characters were utterly mediocre.

The writing style itself was okay. It was caught in an awkward place in between intentionally-formal-sounding and ooh-it-feels-like-the-character-is-talking-to-me styles which kind of just made it seem like Zara was half-robot. But, that being said, it wasn’t bad enough that I wanted to stop reading the book altogether. What I think this author needs to work on is improving her characters and plot, while keeping the writing style like her improved-characters. She has to make it sound like it’s them talking, not someone random or unrelated. Perhaps this stiff style was purposeful and was meant to accentuate Zara’s grief over losing her father. If this was the case, it was poorly executed because the style just came out sounding OFF. One thing I actually really liked about this book was that instead of chapter titles there was a name of a certain phobia and what it was. It was really cool. I love random bits of knowledge like that. I’m not sure if that’s technically considered writing style, but I’ll put it here anyway. Makes her writing overall seem better.

The cover and title. Both are immensely important to selling the book and getting people to want to read it in the first place. The title, I think, is really good. I always lean towards one-word titles because I think they’re intriguing and dramatic, and a one-word title like Need certainly makes you stop and consider it. The cover is pretty good, if a little odd (with the pixie dust lip-gloss). It certainly isn’t the best cover I’ve ever seen, but it’s not bad.

The book as a whole was a let-down. I don’t know what I had expected, but it was something better than this. Need is a very mediocre read. Nothing truly HORRIBLE about it, but nothing good either. It all balances out to something that I wouldn’t remember reading. Something boring, unremarkable and, frankly, a waste of a read. I wouldn’t recommend it, but I wouldn’t strongly advise against it if your heart’s set on reading it.

Real Teen Rating~ C : Ehhh…

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Eclipse - Stephenie Meyer

* #1 New York Times Bestselling Author
* New York Times Bestselling Series
*New York Times Bestseller

If you have not read New Moon, then read at your own risk, this contains spoilers!

Eclipse
Buy it here and support our blog

The Gist

Bella can’t be more happy.  Edward has returned from almost exposing himself to the Volturi and she has taken a poll with the Cullen family and they have decided to turn her into a vampire.  The only thing on her mind is spending her last year of high school with Edward.  Well, she is also thinking about Jacob and how he won’t return any of her calls no matter how hard she tries to contact him.  Meanwhile, Victoria is forming an army of vampires to fight the Cullens and finally get her revenge on Edward for killing her mate James. Leading the new vampires is a vampire that Victoria has turned named Riley who will do anything to please her.  Back in Forks there has been mass murders and the authorities have no idea what is causing them but the Cullens know that it is this new vampire army,  they just aren’t sure who is leading it all.  Meanwhile, Jacob pays Bella and Edward a little visit at school to warn the vampires to stay off werewolf territory.  Bella asks why this is happening and when Jacob tells her of the fight that takes place she gets mad at Edward for not telling her what was happening.  She quickly jumps on his motorcycle to go with him.  When they get to his house he expresses his true feelings for Bella and how he won’t stop until she is his.  Now Bella is faced with the decision Edward or Jacob and she also has a few weeks to decide because if she doesn’t decide the Volturi will.


What We Think

Reviewed by The North Star

Number of Pages: 629

Eclipse….where to begin.  This was the third book in the Twilight Saga and after finishing the cliff hanger at the end of New Moon I couldn’t wait to get my hands on Eclipse and finished it in record timing.  Back when I first read this book I LOVED it because of course I had an unhealthy obsession with the series.  After that phase I went back and re-read the entire series and when I got to Eclipse I realized that the entire she whines a lot like in New Moon.  Except this time she complains about the ULTIMATE decision that she has to make between Jacob and Edward.  Which one is her “soul mate” and if she picks the wrong one her life will end right there and can never be good.  First off, the  writing is still amazing but when I really looked at the book for a second time and read between the lines I noticed that Bella is just leading one of the guys on when she knows she can’t have both of them.  Second, if I had 2 guys fighting over me I would pick one and not watch as it drags on and on even if I wasn’t sure if I was right because I wouldn’t want anyone to suffer (but that is just me). Finally, no offense to Jacob lovers but it was kind of obvious that she loved Edward more and was going to pick him so the fact that she led him on was kinda cruel.

The thing I did like about this book was that you got to learn all of the Cullen’s back rounds, meaning you understood why Rosalie was bitter, Jasper was quiet and kept to himself and how each of them paired off.  Those were the chapters I found I couldn’t put down and would have to finish before I could do anything no matter how important the task I had to do was.  I also really liked how much you got to learn about the newborns because they always were talked about in Twilight and New Moon but were never fully explained but in this book you found out exactly what they were and what they brought to the table of the story.

In the end this was a great book because of the all and power writing that is Stephenie Meyer but could have been edited a little better when it came to Bella complaining all the time but I learned a lot about the other characters which in a way made me feel more connected to the characters.  (:

Real Teen Rating~ B+: Wait for Vacation


Reviewed by Dream Catcher

This was my least favorite of the Twilight Saga books. It was melodramatic and whiney. It took me a while to read it just because I would get bored at a certain part or I’d get annoyed with Bella’s whining. The whole plot was basically just Bella having to choose between Edward and Jacob. And whatever will she do? Then there was that whole thing with the very homicidal Victoria, but that almost seemed like a side plot to the riviting decision Bella had to make.  Ugh that was sarcasm. Her decision making prowess was not riviting at all. I mean, seriously. If you had to decide between the guy you’re in love with – who you are 99.99% is your true love – and the guy who you’re just really good friends with – who you’re only considering because you don’t want to hurt him – who would you pick? I think the answer is obscenely obvious to everyone except Bella.  So I’m sure you get my point. Bella was annoying and really made this book a whole lot worse than it had to be. It’s sad, but I actually liked the eclipse novella, The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner, better than Eclipse itself.  I’m certainly not saying Eclipse was bad; it just was the worst of the saga. Moving on, the characters were pretty good. Except for Bella, of course. And Edward was creepily protective in this book – which was mildly aggrivating. And Stephenie Meyer made Jacob seem like the antagonist of this book, despite the fact that he was also half a love-interest. So basically the characters were good except the three main ones. Great job.  The plot was alright but left a little to be desired. I mean this book had a lot more than Twilight or New Moon when it comes to plot, but that doesn’t mean there was enough. The writing itself was great and the cover and title – as always – were amazingly dramatic.  I probably made it sound like I hated the book. I didn’t. I actually liked it a lot.  Just overall, it wasn’t as good as the others. If you’ve read the first two you obviouly should read this. Finish up the series!

Real Teen Rating~ B : Read it but there’s no rush.

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